Readers will remember that the soon to be notorious, and
previously revered, Bari family, have found themselves in a financial pickle as
a result of the “help” the oldest son Danny obtained from certain New Jersey
relatives. They have now called the
“loan” and want to collect by taking control of the family restaurant, as well
as the other Bari assets. Augie has
drafted a troubling will that has his attorney Portofino Van Steel pondering
what is happening- and Augie has located some Sicilian-Russian relatives who
might solve everything. The action is about to begin.
Christmas Eve dinner in the Bari family was a tradition and a feast that nobody wanted to miss. Held each year in the banquet room of the restaurant (which closed early for the occasion), each member of the clan, guests and close family associates gathered to savor the best of what an Italian kitchen could produce. This year, in light of the developments of the past couple of months, there was more than the usual family tension. In fact it was all that Angelina could do to keep even a semblance of gaiety alive for the children present.
For much had happened to the family. From the perspective of outsiders like Tom Carson, husband of oldest daughter Anna, the whole experience of moving to town was unnerving. Instead of settling in, Anna had become more distant from him and seemingly obsessed with protecting herself and the kids. Similarly, Olaf Swenson, the generally clueless husband of Maggie, the youngest daughter, was unsure why Augie felt it necessary to hire a guard to protect the kids and the house and why Maggie seemed even more than before to be focused on her business of trading antiques (actually bookmaking). So fools and young children were sharing ignorance but not so the family members.
Anna and Maggie were well aware that brother Danny had first allowed a massive fraud to be perpetrated by somebody on the inside which resulted in an embezzlement of most of the family fortune. Then Danny had made things worse by going to the New Jersey relatives to “borrow” enough to pay off the illegal loans and keep the restaurant going. Two thugs named Vinnie and Pollo were collecting on their loans by demanding 100% control of the business and property, all owned by the same entity, which was in turn owned by Augie, the family patriarch. Their professed means of collecting was to take out Augie. Mom, Angelina, was also aware of what had happened, but preferred to deny everything. Augie added to the mix of dinner party members by inviting his cousin Gondola, now Gondorski Ivanovitch, recently from Russia, but originally from Sicily who was in town to take out Vinnie and Pollo. Bernardo and Bruno, the two family retainers were also at dinner.
The first course, in the family tradition, was raw blue point oysters and raw clams followed by hot fresh linguine topped with the sauce from the massive pot of Cioppino which in turn became the next course with calamari, lobster, crab, prawns, clams and mussels served separately from the soup they had simmered in. Everyone then relished the “baccala” (codfish stew) followed by platters of cold cracked crab with romaine, anise and celery. For dessert, the largest Tiramisu imaginable was set out for Angelina to serve. Obviously, with so much splendor, several bottles of Bolla- both white and red- were washed down.
It was during presentation of the Tiramisu that Augie chose to tap his glass and deliver his later to become famous speech.
“You are my bambini” he began. “I will always love you, even from the grave”
“Augie, sit down!” Angelina admonished. “You’ve had too much to drink”
“Angel, you may be right, but what I need to say will not wait. This is the right time and place”, replied her husband.
Put in her place, Angelina sat down and waited for what she thought would be the annual gush about family and friends. Would she ever be surprised.
“So, as I was saying,” continued Augie, “The love I feel for you will never change. Even I, however, have a certain level of tolerance and you have exhausted that”
Tom and Olaf”s heads bobbed up from the Tiramisu all ears. This was not going to be the usual platitude.
“I think all of you know the fix Danny has placed us in. We are walking afraid in our own safe town- chased by thugs, worried about our children’s safety. It is time to put a stop to this. Our cousin Gondorski has agreed to eliminate the immediate threat. He assures me that as we speak at least one of our threats has had an accident falling off the cliff at Dracena Park”.
To say that Tom and Olaf were stunned would not do justice to the looks on their faces. And that astonishment was not relieved when they saw the nods of approval from their wives.
“But, taking out Vinnie or Pollo will not solve our problem.”
“Danny”, Augie said as he turned to his oldest child, “you have not done right by the family. You have brought financial ruin and shame and worst of all you have brought a bunch of thugs to our town. I cannot allow you to inherit what we will now try to rebuild. The wine you just drank will be your last.”
At that moment, Angelina jumped up, grabbed her throat and fell over face first into the Tiramisu. She stopped breathing before she got there.
And so the estate planning begins-or at least the estate unraveling. The New Year’s wake for Angelina will be full of surprises, I would imagine.
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